Chemo Side Effects: The Last Chemo and The Flu

If you're just catching up with me you'll want to start here to learn about my discovery of lumpiness behaving badly which is also known as breast cancer to the every day person, as well as why I am writing about my journey of breast cancer and for the time being a breast cancer blog.

My prior post is here. 

A little over a week ago I sent an email to my basecamp Project Boob Management Group letting them know that hurray it was my last chemo and I was eagerly waiting to write a follow up all about how easy it went and the great dinner I had that night with some wonderful girlfriends that I initially connected with in a mastermind group a couple years ago. 

But, yes there is a big but, the next week had other plans for me, plans to which I wasn't officially invited, rather sucked into like a big vortex.  On the eighth day I came out of this mostly horizontal and running for the bathroom vortex grateful that it's over and life goes on.

My final round of chemo was truthfully no different then the rest.  I brought the fourth girlfriend to my series of catch up with the girlfriends while your body is being pumped with drugs session at Swedish Hospital.  I've even developed a liking for this three plus hour block where it's all about me and the rest of the world doesn't exist for those precious hours. There's no work, no house stuff, no take care of a child, no be a wife or mother, no grocery shopping...it's forced sit there and be present to what ever you want.  Sure you can get up and mosey over to the "nutrition room" or snack room to the rest of the world or take a bathroom break or go any where you want to wheel your IV around, but I prefer to relax into the chemo seat and enjoy the company of a friend, peruse through a magazine or just be in silence.

Plus the nurses in the chemo unit rock and are wonderful women (I never saw any guys there other than Brian the marvelous Thursday afternoon volunteer.) that are equipped with every thing from compassion to humor and pull out what ever is needed on that day.

They even went to the pharmacy to bring me a bottle of sparkling cider to celebrate the last chemo.

The only downside of that day was that I was in between a lot of curtains and it was so loud I couldn't tell whose machine was blinking which indicated it was time to switch to the next of six drugs in my chemo cocktail plan.  There was also a new older woman to my right (I couldn't see her because of the curtain) that was undergoing her first chemo and was emotionally having a difficult time which required the nurses to move into power and compassion mode and spend a lot of time emotionally helping her in addition to going through the whole first chemo education thing.  It made me grateful to have had my special four walled room where I was able to watch OPRAH and chat with chemo girl friend trip #1.  I also realize that she was having a very different experience.

I totally get that - having been diagnosed with breast cancer and going through surgery and chemo has been 70 to 90% mental and really only 10 to 30% physical.  Things like having your hair fall out does have some pain (at least for me) but really it was more of an annoyance to have hair every where and need to practically walk around with a vacuum and use one of those pet rollers.  Hair falling out easily and effortlessly from chemo was minimally 90% emotional and 10% physical (it took a lot of energy to keep cleaning it up).

Now that I have very little hair, maybe 5 to 10% on my head, and I haven't had to shave since February and am used to grabbing a bandanna, scarf or hat I'm thinking, hey this isn't so bad.  I can shower and be ready in like 15 minutes whereas before it took 15 minutes just to dry my hair.  And to top it off I never have a bad hair day or hairy legs.

Back to the last chemo.  This was the first chemo trip I took a nap - which may have been the indicator that my body didn't quite have the "kick'em in the butt and go forth" energy of the other three chemo trips over the past two and a half months.

The day after chemo I was wiped out.  Normally I simply go to work.  I spent multiple hours in a dream state in bed which really wasn't so bad, but Tim and I needed to go to the bank to have some papers notarized before they closed so I had to get up.  This lasted about five minutes because I then fell down the stairs.  I guess my "be awake" legs weren't ready to be awake and provide balance.  Tim brought an ice pack and I went back to bed getting up thirty minutes later fully iced to get off to the bank.  Of course I hit my head on the car getting into it.  What...let me stay in my dream world it was much nicer to my body!

During the weekend I was extremely tired, although I pushed myself to do this brutally long walk with Tim, but only because I hadn't exercised at all in my sloth like state for four days and kept remembering Dr Zucker saying, when you are most tired get out there and walk.  Of course he meant 20 to 30 minutes and not the aggressive 140 minute version up and down significant hills that lead to Magnuson Park on the lake. I have to admit it seemed like an OK idea at the time. I kept thinking, yeah I want to sit down, but, but, but (I wanted to get enough buts in there) after the past chemos you did big walks and were fine, you're just tired, push through it, it's mental.

In retrospect (yeah isn't that the best life lense to use at this time) my body wasn't the "same" kind of tired, it was different, but I didn't know what I didn't know, and I wasn't paying particular attention to the details anyway because I had an agenda to exercise like I had in the past.  Unfortunately my present body had different plans.  The extra tiredness I believe is partially attributed to the accumulative effects of multiple chemo session.  The rest is attributed to the fact that my low immune system was trying to tell me  - SOS.

Sunday afternoon our friends that had taken Eli out to the Zoo in the morning sat with us on our sun deck, ate snacks and painted both Eli's and Ruby's toes and nails beautiful shades of blue and orange for Eli and pink and purple for Ruby.  By the time they left I felt done, and that was the end and the beginning of the flu and a stomach virus to boot.

Result:  push body during chemo when it is on the edge of illness and you get illness because there are NO reserves to bring you back from the edge.

Unfortunately I actually thought I was having some extra bad chemo effects - severe nausea, drop dead tired, chills, and sweats. By Monday late afternoon I was toast.  Let's just say that on Thursday I still had on the same pajamas as Monday night and I needed to sleep in Eli's room because it is only 10 feet to the toilet with non-carpeted floors which is a good thing.

I felt similar to the time I had the colonoscopy - don't fart or pass any gas because you will wear it.  The only thankful thing was I took the chemo power anti-nausea drugs which I believe did help.  It wasn't until I called the doctor late Tuesday at Tim's request that they pronounced flu and stomach virus.  And made me take my temperature and promise to drink enough fluids or come in for an IV, which of course at that time this gal was promising any thing to any one.

The only sad part was that Tim and I were suppose to leave on Wednesday for a long weekend trip to Oregon to celebrate our anniversary which was last month, to see Aunt Kathy who was going to babysit Eli a night, and to see Grandma Ellie on mother's day.  I even had the audacity in my drug stupor, to think I'd still be going and then to email clients that I was really sick and not working on their stuff, but going on vacation the next day.  Yeah right, now they got to see one more facet of is she crazy or what?

Tim left for Oregon after knowing that girlfriend Kathy came to the house and babysat Eli and I on Wednesday.  She told me that she now knows the trick to make me do things.  It's telling me with authority and demanding it.  At least that worked on Wednesday.  I kept staying up because I don't know, I did and she looked me in the eyes and said, "go to be and go to sleep."  To which I mustered, "OK."

Kathy has had the opportunity to see me at "my best" throughout the breast cancer journey - emotional wreck after being diagnosed, post surgery, and flu.

I only woke to have Eli come into his room to ask me to buckle his pants after going to the bathroom.  And when I saw it was 8 o'clock I told him, Eli it's time for bed.  My smarty pants four year old responded, "Mom, your not babysitting me, Kathy is, and she said I could watch a video."

Now had he also listened to Kathy and not woke me up, he would have gotten that video.

Tim was also amazing from afar.  He did leave on Wednesday as there was work in Oregon that he was doing at a retreat center on Thursday and Friday which were the proposed Michele and Eli play days, but when he called and I couldn't talk he realized I needed more help and he called and gathered the troops in our neighborhood to ensure I'd get what help I needed and that Eli could get to school as well as have some one pick him up, feed him, etc. 

After a tough Wednesday night, Thursday morning was slow but I definitely was feeling better. I had a menu of toast and applesauce for the day, and was very grateful to keep it all in.  I also because to realize I was very hungry but afraid to eat and wanted to shower which is a good sign. 

Friday was a good day, I took Eli  to school, ate breakfast, got dressed in real clothes and life was normal once again.  It's actually pretty amazing how our bodies can feel like they are going to split apart and disintegrate into nothingness one day and the next you want eggs on toast and actually notice the huge pile of mail that's built up from the past week.

Amazingly Eli is still sleeping on Saturday morning at 9 am and I'm on the blog for the first time in weeks.  Hurray, chemo is over and life is good and I'm filled with gratitude and love for all those in my life.

Regards, Michele Corey

Writing for Knee Deep Blog A dose on insight and a little crap from your not always average home based business and Internet mom and Money Wise Women: A Blog for Women that are ready to get their financial house in order

And of course I can't leave out the business:  Advanced Approach

PS. Now you can find me simply by typing in http://www.kneedeepblog.com

Financially

If you want to financially help us with out of pocket medical - I say thank you in advance because due to some other circumstances during the past year and a half this wasn't some thing we financially ready for and are open to help whether it be $10 or $100 which we say thank you or let me totally get out of my comfort zone $100+. (And believe me that it took a lot of courage on my side to drop my fears and ego and ask). 

Money (cash or visa) can be sent through a secure system - PalPay.   You can contribute either anonymously or not.  Offerings may be sent to michelec (at) unleashthemagic.com - obviously write it like an email address or by clicking on the Donate button below.

I am also committed to either - taking this off once we know we are covered and / or leaving it up and contributing to others that have cancer and need help - once we get there I will ask you.

Comments

[Michele Corey]

Sherri Jo,

Do post your blog URL, I'd love to come by and visit. Also, please email me directly if you'd like to chat.

Regards, Michele

[Sherri Jo]

Hi Michele. Your blog was passed on to me from a friend at the National Alliance of Childrens Trust Funds who did some work with your husband. I have been diagnosed with breast cancer and have a son named Eli! My friend thought I might enjoy reading about your journey - and I have. I am a few months behind you in the process. I had a lumpectomy in April and started my first chemo yesterday! Blogging has been a great outlet for me. Looks like it has been for you, too. Its wonderful to read some one else's experences and to know that so many have walked before me.

Congrats on your last chemo. I have 5 more to go. I will look forward to your posts on radiation as I will be following in your footsteps!

Sherri Jo

[gsk]

Hi -
Yes I had 34 treatments that started about a month after my last "big" chemo. (I continued Herceptin every 3 weeks until I completed a year.)

For me, the radiation setup took about 2 hours. Part of that time I waited to go up to have a CT scan after all the wires and markings were placed "just right".

What I really remember about that first visit was I was very, very cold. They keep the room chilly for the machines - but I felt like I was in a freezer.

I made my appointments for 6:30 am so I could "roll out of bed" and go up to the hospital (which is 4 blocks away). In the end, I never really rolled out of bed - but I was glad I had the early morning apptmt. I was able to get an early start and use the rest of my day how I wanted.

One of the funny things was they needed to "tape down" my other breast because it was "in the way" of the radiation beam. So every morning before I could have my treatment, they would use about a half roll of tape to make sure the beam hit the correct spot. (My tumor was at the 6 o'clock position close to the chest wall.)

After about one and a half weeks into the treatment I started experiencing some side effects.

Just outside the radiation zone, I had a "recall sunburn". In my younger days I had a sunburn and the radiation brought it back. The doctor prescribed a very expensive cream and also ice packs every night. The ice packs did a great job.

Itching was another issue - and I was given a different cream for that.

Every night, I gave myself a "cream and ice treatment" for about an hour.

The very last week I had "weeping" from the radiation area. I used a icy cotton cloth (soaked in ice water and then rung out)and applied it to the area.

Overall, I thought radiation was a breeze compared to the chemo. I didn't feel tired - my radiation oncologist asked that I keep up my walking routine and said that would help. It also helped I had a planned trip to Florida leaving two days after radiation was complete.

The trip made the end goal post that much sweeter!

Good luck!

[Michele]

Great to see you back on the blog too!

Yes I will be having full breast radiation. My planning session is Thursday and radiation will begin next week for the standard daily for six weeks.

Once this is complete then I will have my time back which I look forward to.

They said plan on an hour for set up, etc. even though the actual radiation is only a few minutes. And drive time with parking is about an hour. So 2 hours per day for 30 sessions.

Did you have radiation? Was it more tiring for you? That's the big question mark for me - how will it affect me?

Have a great week, Michele

[gsk]

Congratulations Michele on completing your chemo!

It really is a special day - but family & friends don't understand how special it really is. You take bck "owning" your time instead of being under the doctor's timetable.

Now that chemo is over, in about a month you will start to see the fuzz on your head become thicker.

Enjoy your summer and take care of yourself. Your body still needs time to recuperate. Do you need radiation?
gsk