Chemo, Hair Loss & Finding Self Love: 36 Hands Of Love

If you're just catching up with me you'll want to start here to learn about my discovery of lumpiness behaving badly which is also known as breast cancer to the every day person, as well as why I am writing about my journey of breast cancer and for the time being a breast cancer blog.

My prior post is here.  My next post is here.

I decided to move this part of the post over to a new post so I could highlight the great photos I just received.

Last week I went to Eli's school to read Chem Cat by Cathy Nilon to his class of 18.  I figured it was time as he whipped off my hats when I picked him up from Kid's Club.  Thankfully there were only two kids.  One laughed and the other just stood there in shock.  I've learned that if kids have an understanding of what is going on, they think the whole cancer thing is quite interesting and baldness is very cool, but if they don't there is mixed reaction.

Unfortunately Eli's assistant teacher was also diagnosed with breast cancer and is in chemo.  She is one week ahead of me in chemo but has not had surgery yet.  She wears a beautiful wig.  She has also decided not to share her story with the kids which I respect.

I of course am sharing every thing because that is what works for me and have no qualms about sharing any thing from my pain to the humor I find in this breast cancer journey.  Sharing brings me a sense of peace.  Hearing the reactions to what I am writing or how I am living my life right now is worth every word I write.

Imagine 18 bright eye kids bursting with questions and interrupting to spit out their own comments as you read each page.  It just cracked me up.  They did an awesome job.  After finishing Chem Cat (great book by the way) I said that I was just like Chem Cat and that I had breast cancer. 

"In fact the medicine I am taking made my hair fall out too. I have a surprise under my hat." 

Their eyes were bulging with wanting to know.  "I have on another hat.  I'm wearing two hats.  Why would I wear two hats?" 

"Because you're cold." some one yelled. 

"yes", I replied.  Why would I be that cold? 

"You have no hair!" some yelled. 

"That's right, I am bald under this hat.  Do you want to see my head?"

"Yessss!"

"So do you think I will look like an alien like chemo cat?"

"Yessssss!" 

"Is there any one that doesn't want to see.  If you don't want to see raise your hand."  No hands.  And you know when they are 4 and 5 they have no qualms and are not self aware enough to worry what others are thinking about seeing a bald woman.

I pulled off my second hat and watched their big bulging eyes and mouths either open or smile.  "Would anyone like to touch my head?"

Immediately they stood up and rushed towards me with their hands out in front of them while yelling, "yes."

Now imagine 36 hands doing their best to get to one head.  "how does it feel?" I asked, "Is it soft?"

"Your head is so soft." and "I can't reach" and "It's my turn" all came out at once. 

There was a cute blond girl inches from my face she rubbed my head looked me in the eyes and then rubbed my nose and said, "your head is really soft and your nose is soft too." I smiled and thanked her.

That's Elias sitting on my lap with his bandana on.  After all the kids finished petting my head he wanted to hang out with mom some which was great! 

So that's my experience of sharing breast cancer, chemo and almost baldness with 18 kids and 36 hands of love.  It was an amazing experience.  It filled my heart with joy and made me want to be bald long enough to do it again.  Maybe this should be a part of the healing experience - to experience the unconditional love of kids petting your head and telling you with each stroke you're bald, bodacious and beautiful!

Regards, Michele Corey, writing for Knee Deep Blog A dose on insight and a little crap from your not always average home based business and Internet mom and Money Wise Women: A Blog for Women that are ready to get their financial house in order

Here's the info on Chemo Cat if you decide you want to order a copy.

And of course I can't leave out the business:  Advanced Approach

PS. Now you can find me simply by typing in http://www.kneedeepblog.com

Financially

If you want to financially help us with out of pocket medical - I say thank you in advance because due to some other circumstances during the past year and a half this wasn't some thing we financially ready for and are open to help whether it be $10 or $100 which we say thank you or let me totally get out of my comfort zone $100+. (And believe me that it took a lot of courage on my side to drop my fears and ego and ask). 

Money (cash or visa) can be sent through a secure system - PalPay.   You can contribute either anonymously or not.  Offerings may be sent to michelec (at) unleashthemagic.com - obviously write it like an email address or by clicking on the Donate button below.

I am also committed to either - taking this off once we know we are covered and / or leaving it up and contributing to others that have cancer and need help - once we get there I will ask you.