Knee Deep Blog

Defining Moments: Farts, Farting and Defining Social Norms

I just finished reading a post, Daddy did you....? over at Genuine Blog where Jim Turner is the Genuine Dad and spills the good, the funny and the questionable.  Of course you want to answer the question, Daddy did you.....fart!  It's a great story and worth the read.

The social norms around farts and farting just literally crack me up.  I suppose it starts when you're young and beginning to be more verbal like Eli is now and you open your mouth and speak your truth and have an adult "shhhussh you" into silence that you begin to learn the societal taboo around farts and farting.  As you know Eli has no problem with speaking his truth and mom and dad are doing our best to help him understand what is said at home and what is said in public - it's going to take a while..  Heck poor daddy is daddy toot toot, but truth be told I think he is quite proud as he offers his finger and says, Eli, pull my finger and let's a big one rip.  We all giggle and make comments fit only within our homes borders. 

As a young child at first I thought it was hilarious when my dad did the old pull your finger trick. As I got older I didn't want to play the game any more because I knew exactly what he was going to do so I wouldn't pull his finger.  Some how I really thought that farts were controlled and it wouldn't happen, but since I had 5 other often willing siblings that darn finger always packed a punch.  Hence the beginnings of my amusement with farting.

Tim's father died during my pregnancy and my father died when Eli was 3 months old - so Eli would have never experienced this universal finger pulling trick.  The first time I saw Tim do it I thought, do all families do it?  In retrospect I'm able to look at it and say, it's come full circle and in my perception is entering its 3rd generation of finger pulling, smiles, and the famous daddy giggle. 

I do some times wonder how many generations "pull my finger" goes back...it's kind of a weird social norm that many know about but don't acknowledge. Since my dad was first generation American via Poland I have a hard time imagining his dad whom didn't speak English very well said it, but who knows.  Unfortunately I can't go back and ask.

Remember That Journey to Building an Online Business?

Remember that journey to starting an online business that I started ages ago?  On Wednesday I had an aha that shook and shifted me just enough that I actually went into immediate action.  Although I had heard these words numerous times, especially from my coach, and I have said it at least 100 times to clients and friends that one would have thought it would have crept in through osmosis, but because I just couldn't seem so shake off the need to be perfect before I applied thesse deep words of wisdom that I couldn't gain any momentum in my own online business world. 

What are the deep quotable words?

Just do it, take action any action.

What has continually gotten in the way?  My desire to do things well, to have them be perfect from the beginning.

What did I do?

You'll love this - yes one of my secrets that most people don't know about me (although now you do) is that I love and find tattoos completely intriguing.  Yes, I'm one of those tattoo gawkers (I'm actually quite polite) that loves both the color and intricacies of tattoo design as well as the individual story that  goes with it.

Defining Moments: Preschoolers Comprehension of Words

As usual my preschooler Eli reminds me that his understanding and description of words are indeed different from my understanding - aka different communication styles and understanding.  Thankfully it brings some comic relief to our lives especially during as those difficult moments arise during our parent - child life journey and his "thundering threes."

I decided to find a cultural event to take Eli to as well as appreciate myself since Tim was heading out hiking with a couple friends for the day.  We were in luck, the Seattle Center was hosting both The Fine Feline Cat Show and a Turkish Festival. After explaining the best I could what we would see, Eli was more excited to see the cats and I was definitely leaning towards the Turkish Festival folk dances and of course food because I love to eat and explore new tastes.

Just as we were getting ready to leave I thought about inviting our neighbor Kristin and her daughter Olivia which is one of Eli's "bestest" friends.  Synchronicity provided Kristin in our driveway as I walked outside to get a take on the weather (and decide coat or no coat). 

We walked down a few doors to pick up Olivia and her mom when Eli went running into the house full of his usual excitement and said this deep and child wisdom filled quote....

"Olivia, we're going to go see Turkeys.  Boy and girl turkeys and they are going to be wearing costumes and dancing. (he blurts out laughing obviously knowing this would be quite a spectacle)   

Mom will they be in Halloween costumes? (with the most sincerity) 

And we're going to see lots of lots of cats.  Hooray.  Want to come right now?"

Deep Thoughts on Learning In The Moment

The deep thought and affirmative quote that started my day is from Florence Scovel Shinn and The Game Of Life.

An adverse situation can be good; I am undisturbed by it, and it falls away of its own weight.  None of these things move me.

It's so interesting to have picked that inspirational card literally right after I sent an email to a client that had the following sentence. "It is interesting how the "universe" is really working with you...although at individual moments it may be seeming to conspire against you." This was sent in response to an email in which my client had said he had tried to take an action in his business out of fear and that didn't work out, as well as because he has lost two clients in the past week.

I notice how easy it is to fall into the emotional trap of wanting some thing so much in the moment that it is easy to forget that it really doesn't fit into the bigger picture.  And in fact with it out of the way you can focus on what is most important.

Losing any client work when you are self employed can feel like a big blow and I absolutely want to acknowledge that feeling.  Yet,

Deep Thoughts: 5 Thoughts on Getting Advice

I just came back from a trip to the east coast and recognize now more than ever we live in a 24/7 culture. All around us we are bombarded with never ending thoughts, ideas and advice of "how to this and that" and "what to do"  as well as "if you don't do X you will either live a painful or fearful life or die a slow and painful death.  So what is a gal to do in these trying times?

Some times I really enjoy the information and advice that comes my way and others times I just want to yell "shut up" or "stop the madness."  Heck if I could just pull the plug both literally on my computer and figuratively as I'm listening to someone with that glazed over look of not wanting to be there at that exact moment I'd be filled with joy.

Have you ever felt that way?

So what is advice any way?  I'd describe advice as some some type of information that someone thinks you either must have or if you had would make your life better.

Being a consultant, coach, mom, wife, an extrovert as well as friend to a sizable group of individuals I've had my share both giving and receiving advice.  So how do you know when to listen (because it's good and timely) and how do you know when to stop the flow of information that is simply filling up your head with stuff that you are not going to use in the next month or perhaps even this lifetime?

Yesterday afternoon I pulled a card from one of my favorite inspiration decks: 

"Rich people take advice from people who are richer than they are. 

Is It Really Necessary to Change Your Thoughts?

It's 11:45 and I've been impatiently waiting for my work day to shift into gear - what I mean is the one I set up.  Fortunately and unfortunately I can already tell it's going to be one of those days that beats to its own drum and instead playing the beat I had mindfully laid out.

Unless I shift my thinking from impatience to some thing more positive I already know that I'll feel the backlash of resistance that is building and quite possibly miss out on the opportunity that is presenting itself within this new beat. One thing that helps me get reconnected is to look up a quote and read it through out the day. 

Here's my deep quote on change.

"It is not necessary to change; survival is not mandatory" - W. Edwards Deming

My day so far...7 am Yoga...my once per week morning indulgence was missed...Eli stayed at Grandma's last night as he often does once per week so Tim and I can have time alone or work on a project of choice and so I actually go to yoga once per week.